THE SOLDIERS OF OUR QUEEN - W. S. Gilbert Poems

 
 

Poems » w. s. gilbert » the soldiers of our queen

THE SOLDIERS OF OUR QUEEN
DRAGOONS:

The soldiers of our Queen
    Are linked in friendly tether;
Upon the battle scene
    They fight the foe together.

There ev'ry mother's son
    Prepared to fight and fall is;
The enemy of one
    The enemy of all is!
The enemy of one
    The enemy of all is!

[On an order from the MAJOR they fall back.]

[Enter the COLONEL. All salute.]

COLONEL:

If you want a receipt for that popular mystery,
    Known to the world as a Heavy Dragoon,

DRAGOONS: [saluting] Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

COLONEL:

Take all the remarkable people in history,
    Rattle them off to a popular tune.

DRAGOONS: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

COLONEL:
The pluck of Lord Nelson on board of the Victory --
    Genius of Bismarck devising a plan --
The humour of Fielding (which sounds contradictory) --
    Coolness of Paget about to trepan --
The science of Jullien, the eminent musico --
    Wit of Macaulay, who wrote of Queen Anne --
The pathos of Paddy, as rendered by Boucicault --
    Style of the Bishop of Sodor and Man --
The dash of a D'Orsay, divested of quackery --
Narrative powers of Dickens and Thackeray --
Victor Emmanuel -- peak-haunting Peveril --
Thomas Aquinas, and Doctor Sacheverell --
    Tupper and Tennyson -- Daniel Defoe --
    Anthony Trollope and Mister Guizot!  Ah!

DRAGOONS: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

COLONEL                          DRAGOONS
Take of these elements all      A Heavy Dragoon,
    that is fusible                a Heavy Dragoon,
Melt them all down in a          A Heavy Dragoon,
    pipkin or crucible            a Heavy Dragoon,
Set them to simmer,              A Heavy Dragoon
    and take off the scum,        a Heavy Dragoon,
And a Heavy Dragoon              Is the residuum!
    is the residuum!


COLONEL:
If you want a receipt for this soldier-like paragon,
    Get at the wealth of the Czar (if you can) --
The family pride of a Spaniard from Aragon --
    Force of Mephisto pronouncing a ban --
A smack of Lord Waterford, reckless and rollicky --
    Swagger of Roderick, heading his clan --
The keen penetration of Paddington Pollaky --
    Grace of an Odalisque on a divan --
The genius strategic of Caesar or Hannibal --
Skill of Sir Garnet in thrashing a cannibal --
Flavour of Hamlet -- the Stranger, a touch of him --
Little of Manfred (but not very much of him) --
    Beadle of Burlington -- Richardson's show --
    Mister Micawber and Madame Tussaud! Ah!

DRAGOONS: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

COLONEL                          DRAGOONS
Take of these elements all      A Heavy Dragoon,
    that is fusible                a Heavy Dragoon,
Melt them all down in a          A Heavy Dragoon,
    pipkin or crucible            a Heavy Dragoon,
Set them to simmer,              A Heavy Dragoon
    and take off the scum,        a Heavy Dragoon,
And a Heavy Dragoon              Is the residuum!
    is the residuum!

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